Energy In Motion

What's your relationship with anger? 

Are you overwhelmed by it? Fearful of it? Maybe even shameful of it? Your chosen adjective might be different, but the vast majority of men and women have a standard agreement with themselves that when anger begins to churn, they will stuff it down the best they can and seldom allow themselves to express it. 

Sound familiar? Ever had that "seeing red" kind of reaction?  Ever felt it starting, snap at something/someone, then just ignore it and carry on? That is what I would call unhealthy relationships with anger. 

That snap, that snarky comment, that clenched fist, that phone you just threw across the room, or the wall you punched can be described as an off gassing of emotion. Like a kettle boiling. That action might have temporarily stopped the annoying whistle, but you only lifted it off the heat. Once the kettle touches the heat again, it's a shorter amount of time until the whistle returns. 

It's okay and natural to get pissed, (anyone who says otherwise probably considers themselves so "self enlightened" that you probably won't find yourself talking to them for long anyways) but to ignore the emotion and not feel it through is the trap. 

Without external stimulus or forces we have 3 tools at hand to help us through "the feeling of it" at all times. Our voice, our breath, and our bodies. 

Our bodies: Emotion = Energy in MOTION. Move you're f'ing body! A clenched fist doesn't move, so the emotion can't move. Loosen the hand and just try shaking your arms/body out a little (a few mins will probably do it). Or keep the fist, put a glove on it, and beat the living crap out of a heavy bag. Instead of doing what you've always done and figuratively "run" from the feeling, literally try sprinting from it.  Whatever motion resonates with you, do it. Do it until the anger subsides and you feel the shift. Trust me, it won't take that long.

Our breath: We can put some motion to the emotion through our breath. Example: Deep and calm through the nose and into the belly, then forcefully push all that breath out through your mouth with effort. This is just a simple example, but try it a few times right now and notice the immediate shift in energy. A fantastic practice of this is something taught in the Nine8 program that I have used on a regular basis for years called "warrior breathing".

Our voice: it doesn't matter how many words you use to describe your anger, it won't help you move through it. What I mean by voice here is sound. We can move emotion through sound. One of the most experiential practices (also found in the Nine8 program) I was ever shown and have taught is something called a "primal scream". Hopefully the name doesn't stop you there.......get over yourself. Similar to a workout I believe it is best done in sets, beginning and followed by calm steady breath and relaxation to balance and recenter yourself. The scream is just that, however long you want it to be, but don't tip toe around it, actually scream! If you've ever watched the movie Bad Santa and can recall the scene where Thurman Merman learns to fight, that might help you understand what I mean when I say don't "tip toe" around it. I know what you're thinking, "I can't just scream" I have kids, I live in an apartment, people will hear me, etc etc. Solutions to this are to 1. Just not care. 2. Do this practice in the outdoors (as in a forest, not your neighbourhood park beside the playground) 3. Use the super tactical silencer of screaming, a pillow! Out of those 3, I'm a big advocate of #2, but #3 is how you can incorporate this practice on a regular basis without getting put on a watch list of some sort. 

All in all, the big point I want you to take away from this is that anger, like all our emotions, needs to be felt and experienced. Instead of losing control of your actions, you can recognize it's presence, take it off the boil for a moment, then when you have the time and space you can put it in motion and clear it. 

I challenge you to think of anger and other emotions as a source of energy to be used, not to shy away from. Our poor relationships with anger is often built upon the regret and shame we experience from how we have handled that energy in the past, and the way we lost control over it. It doesn't have to stay that way. 

Questions? Completely disagree and think this is dumb? Either way I'd love to chat about it: [email protected] / 604-818-4265